Someone is trying to buy us out

The chief executive officer of an electronics company called in his public relations director.  “Listen, Wilson.  Someone is trying to buy us out.  It’s your job to get the price of our stock up so it’ll be too expensive for them.  I don’t care how you do it, just do it.”  And he did.

When asked how, he replied, “I started a rumor Wall Street obviously liked.”

“What was that?”

“I told them you were resigning.”

Bible Reading Plan – March 2018, Week 10

Monday, March 5:

Moses & the Golden Calf – Moses’ absence for 40 days and Israel’s Idolatry

  • Exodus 32
  • Psalms 106:19-23
  • Acts 7:37-43

Tuesday, March 6:

Moses & Seeing God – Moses’ face shines with God’s glory after being in God’s presence

  • Exodus 33
  • Exodus 34
  • 2 Corinthians 3


Bible Reading Plan – February – March, 2018, Week 9

Monday, February 26:

Moses & Water from the Rock – Moses strikes the rock for live-giving water

  • Exodus 17:1-7
  • Psalms 78:12-25
  • 1 Corinthians 10:1-4


Tuesday, February 27:

Moses & Holding up his Arms – Israel’s warfare & Moses’ prayer (supported by others)

  • Exodus 17:8-15
  • Deuteronomy 25:17-19
  • 1 Timothy 2:8


Made For Something More

“Identity” is a buzz word in our world – that question of what makes us who we are.  The world tells us our identity is determined by a bunch of different factors, including:

  • How we see ourselves,
  • How we feel, and
  • What others expect us to be.

But if you’ve tried to define yourself based on those factors, you know they’re ultimately hollow; they shift around like sand, leaving us with nothing solid to hold on to.


They Are Jealous

Pete was telling a friend that he had just lost his job.  “Why did the foreman fire you?” the friend asked in surprise.


“Oh,” Pete said, “you know how foremen are.  They stand around with their hands in their pockets watching everyone else work.”


“We all know that,” replied his friend.  “But why did he let you go?”


“Jealousy,” answered Pete.  “All the other workers thought I was the foreman.”


Here are some tip-offs that your child may have some flaws . . . even though you may think he or she is perfect:


  • Your child gets extra credit for being absent.
  • Neighbors always have their cement poured while you are on vacation.
  • You find the phone off the hook and the mailbox in his room.
  • You are shopping with your child and a clerk give you a flyer from the store across the street.

Bible Reading Plan – February 2018, Week 8

Monday, February 19:

Moses & Pharaoh – God’s message to Pharaoh & Pharaoh’s arrogant rejection

  • Exodus 5
  • Exodus 6:1-13
  • Nehemiah 9:9-10


Tuesday, February 20:

Moses & the Miracles – God reveals Himself through miracles & plagues

  • Exodus 7
  • Exodus 8
  • Psalms 105:23-38


Where God Lives

Helen Wilton, a Sunday school teacher, asked her class of preschoolers if they knew where God lives.  Stephen Mason, a precocious six-year-old, raised his hand, and the teacher called on him.”


“God lives in my bathroom,” the boy confidently answered.


Bible Reading Plan – February 2018, Week 7

Monday, February 12:

Joseph & Caring for Family – God uses Joseph’s suffering for others

  • Genesis 46
  • Genesis 47
  • Romans 8:28


Tuesday, February 13:

Jacob & the Blessings – Jacob passes on God’s blessing before he dies

  • Genesis 48
  • Genesis 49:29-33
  • Hebrews 11:20-21


Getting Things Done

In his book, How to Use Humor for Business Success, Malcolm Kushner reports that there are three ways to get things done: 

1) Do it yourself. 

2) Ask someone else to do it. 

3) Ask your kids not to do it.