A mother asked her son why he didn’t take his little sister along as he left to go fishing, and he said, “Because the last time I took her I didn’t catch a thing.”   Mother said, “I’m sure she’ll be quite if you explain to her.”   “Oh, it wasn’t the noise,” the boy replied, “She ate the bait.”

The biggest lie in America, according to Norm Chad of Sport’s Illustrated is: “The game’s almost over honey, I’ll be there in a minute.”